Some say that we are the products of our experiences.  They believe that who we become is a direct reflection of what we have gone through. So, what do you do when your experiences have all but killed you? Who do you become when the images of your past are ones that you would prefer to forget, suppress, or hide?  I know the cliché, “What doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger.” I also know that when the darkness of trauma presses down on you making it hard to breathe or think or feel, that the cliché has no power.  It cannot lift the heaviness that smothers your soul, suffocating the peace and joy that is rightfully yours.  Neither can it erase the past, its memories or its scars.  However, there is hope for your present and for your future.  You are the exception to the rules.  You are not the sum of your experiences, and you are not a reflection of what you have gone through.  No, you are more than that.  You are greater than any abuse or abuser.  You have more resilience, strength, and determination than the drama and the trauma. You are an image of greatness; even your reflection exudes purpose and power.

I can hear you saying, “But you don’t know what I’ve been through.”  And to that, I say, you are right.  I do not know what you’ve been through, but I do know that you are still here.  And because of that, I know that you are primed and positioned to not only survive, but to live and to live life abundantly. I know that your life is filled with purpose and that you have much to offer this world. I do not deny the realities of your experience.  In fact, my own favorite poetic line is, “Life aint been no crystal stair,” because it is fitting for what I have lived through and am now living beyond.  No, I do not know your specific circumstances, but I do know trauma, and I know that we can do a lot with what we’ve got. Again, I do not deny what you have gone through, but I will say that what has happened, and in some cases, what is happening, does not change, mitigate, or negate your purpose, which is the essence of who you are.

Sometimes, people fail to use objects for their intended purposes.  In some cases, it is because they don’t know the intended purpose.  Some don’t know how to use the object properly, and some just don’t care.  Regardless, the way they use or misuse the object does not change its purpose.  You can call a t.v. a car all you want, but you will never be able to get in and drive it. The same applies for people (we are not objects).  Neither those who misused or abused you, your experiences, nor your trauma can overpower or subdue your purpose. So, you ask, how do I move forward?  What do I do with this?  The first step is to get free!

You have got to free yourself from everything that others have said about you or done to you because it is causing conflict and confusion. To get free from them, you must get them out of your psyche and out of your spirit. It may be painful to bring them to mind, but the end result will be worth it.  Consider doing this activity.  Bring all of those negative words and experiences to mind. Write them down and burn them, throw them away, flush them…whatever. But be sure to dispose of them.  They do not belong to you or within you.  Get rid of them.  Get free because you’ve got stuff to do!